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"2017, February 6, smog. I came back from Hainan, I recognized the biological father, she called me brother, at that moment, let me know that my life, there is no darkest, only darker. Long time I didn’t write a diary. I didn’t know where to start. I’m sorry. Let’s talk about it first. Tingting, that night in Hainan, we agreed, you go back to get married, I know new girls, we all start new Life, meet each other and be brothers and sisters. But I’m sorry, I lied to you again, the reason I promised you is because I want you to stay in heaven. I’ve been in the dark **** for many years, I It's impossible to go back to the world anymore. If you let me give up loving you, let me die. You will never know that the day I met you in 1996, I was destined to live without you, so I would live my life alone. If someone really can replace you, I gave up you when I knew you were my biological sister. Maybe I was too stubborn, but there was no way, I knew I liked you At that moment, I had locked my heart. I painted myself as a prison, and then tried my best to lose the key. My heart could not be opened, and no one would come in again. You can't go out."

"On February 10, 2017, Song Menghua selected a lot of marriage partners for me, and greeted Song Qingchun over to help me find it. I can see that she was a little sad, but she still helped me find a girl very seriously. The Song family returned home, it was already eleven o'clock, after taking a bath, lying on the bed, they couldn't sleep anymore. I thought about the story of me and her from beginning to end, and I was still not sleepy. This is from After Hainan came back, for the fourth time, I could not sleep through the night. I knew that she had to marry Qin Yinan. I also knew that no matter how much pain she had, she should let her look at me without pain, but I I also know that I may not be able to support it. I am not so strong. I am so strong that I can see my love in my life. It is so peaceful to marry another man. It is so strong and calm that I will raise a glass to her at her wedding. A sentence that fits together for a hundred years."

"On February 14, 2017, her wedding was settled. On March 14, White Day, today I had a headache for almost three hours during the day. I stood in front of the floor-to-ceiling windows and watched the sunset, facing the front. Suddenly I walked up. Fortunately, the floor-to-ceiling window blocked me. At that moment, I realized that I might be ill, because I had the intention of suicide without knowing it. I know that I should I saw a doctor, but I didn’t go to the doctor, but bought some sedatives myself. The reason I don’t want to see a psychiatrist is very simple. I like my own sister, who is spurned, looked down on, disgusted, disgusted, all It doesn't matter, after all, I have experienced these when I was very young, but I don't want people to know that my sister is her, I don't want her to be disgusted because of me, she is the best in my life, I die The most beautiful thing to protect."

"In February 16th, 2017, I missed an individual name called Self Stabbing Thousand Swords. I miss her very much, and I stabbed Thousand Swords every day."